The Dreamers Disease by Trampabel: Mosaic of crazy on Pinterest

Monday, 13 April 2015

Mosaic of crazy on Pinterest

I've pinned images that I've found interesting on the theme of madness. It's such a rich and fascinating subject to me. The parameters of what is considered mad seem to shift and change.

https://uk.pinterest.com/isybluebell/madness-they-call-it-madness/

I connected deeply with the album Quadrophenia as a teenager. I find it so brilliant the film and the music. It's illustrates so perfectly for me what it feels like to be isolated even in a crowd.

The sea is a big character in the film. I remember spending time gazing painfully at the sea feeling it understood me, cold and desolate. The Rock an instrumental and Love reign o'ver me,these two songs I feel are beautiful black, bleak, cold and deep. Really not easy listening.
I have been reading a lot on and off about isolation and loneliness. It seems it is a really unhealthy condition not just on mental health but on physical health as well.

In my experience a feeling of loneliness brings on anxiety making it harder to relax in company and on my own. I've started to explore that the feeling of isolation in myself might be self imposed. Escaping my anxiety through activities and various addictions, anything to distract myself from reality. So I starting to believe isolation is a symptom of a dissatisfaction with life.

Because people can spend a lot of time alone and be very happy or spend a lot of time with people and be very unhappy and lonely. I am now trying to make peace with my circumstances and environment, making friends with whats around me, rather than fight with the clutter and always being busy and,just being again. Letting it do its thing, being there, looking messy and me not bolting for the exit. It seems ok so far when I stop shouting at me, with, when am I going to sort out that?, and this stuff? etc etc. I can see I have some lovely things to look at, I haven't looked at something for any length of time for no reason since I was a kid. I don't remember isolation being a big deal then, despite being alone a lot, because things were beautiful, nature, shop windows, books and pictures. Interactions come and go and they can be wonderful. I'm seeing the immediate environment was also a friend to me. I think I might be being a bit mindful noticing and appreciating whats around.

This is what I think is missing from Jimmy's life (the main character in Quadrophrenia) I think he misses a lot of opportunities to truly connect because he is in so much emotional pain.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/2a/Quadrophenia_(soundtrack).jpg

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A story by Izzy

Live Forever

Once upon a time, in a place far far away, there lived a beautiful and spirited woman, who was like a wild flower.

Her hair contained the most incredible dreams and wonderful magic spells, from the most beautiful parts of the earth and from the edges of the solar system.

The wind of the East fell deeply in love with her and played through her lovely locks, it became such that she could command the weather.

One day the wind spoke to the smoke of her cigarette and told it to cling to each and every strand of her beautiful hair.
The cigarette smoke obeyed the wind and saturated through everyone of the golden threads and began to decay from within.

The bright sunshine of her days began to grow dimmer and colder and she was dragged deep under ground and was sent to Whitchurch Castle in the clouds.

Here she battled tooth and nail with demons and dragons. Spoke with angels and had untold adventures with good and evil.

The beautiful dreams that dwelt in her hair, turned into terrifying nightmares.

She went to the well to wash her hair, but the water would not cleanse or renew it. The sun refused to shine upon it and the saddest of all, the wind no longer wanted to play with it.

So the young woman by this time, had become a princess, scraped back her beloved hair into a ponytail and the gold sunshine began to grow out, taking her dreams and magic spells with it.

The Castle keepers were worried about her and so gave her a magic potion to rid the evil smoke that had claim of her hair.
An eternity came and went and she grew older.

One clear day the smoke had finally gone once and for all.

She was banished from the kingdom of Whitchurch and was now expected to toil the fields with the good men and women of the outside world.

She was now mortal and pined for the Easterly wind to play with her again, but he no longer loved her.

One cold morning, she had an idea to attract him back to her, so she sat at her mirror and plaited her hair into strands and put coloured ribbon on the ends to bind them.
Would he notice her again?

With her hair plaited, he would see a string of golden tears that she cried over missing him so much.

?
Now she lives in a little hut in the village and has worn her hair in plaits for 2,000 years.

One day she hopes it will be unravelled, when he remembers where he left his sunny days and warm nights with her on the moon.
The End

Wecome to my blog

Hi Welcome to my blog

I am exploring themes around mental illness and madness. I have been producing images around these subjects and in my written work.

After leaving my BA course in visual art. I have produced some work for mental health establishments that you can see in various parts of this blog.

I am passionate about how mental health issues effects lives. Because of my own experiences, and the people and places within the mental health community my life has become richer.

I hope by celebrating mental illness for the purposes of empowering myself and hopefully other people. I hope to raise awareness a bit by being open and positive.

Personally having had these difficulties, I've had to become stronger and dig deep into my own resources to survive. I have learned a lot about myself in the process.
Everyone at some point in their lives struggles. I think to recognize our own strengths is empowering. I think it is very important to get back on your feet after experiencing difficulties, otherwise you may be stepped on, walked over or overlooked until you do. That's the way life can be in my experience

Confidence and self esteem or empowerment is crucial to recovery. I believe, the service user can end up dependent, and a victim if they don't take control back ( if possible) in their lives. I think it takes a lot of fight to get back on your feet. I think having a mental health crises is like having a serious accident, where the person is injured physically, it takes a lot of medical intervention, support etc.. from many areas, but most importantly a Herculean effort from the person who has the difficulties to get strong again.

Hope that is not off putting to anyone, feel free to comment. Love to hear feedback.

Just to add, for me life is a case of sink or swim by its nature, its difficult, it doesn't really make concessions if you can't cope. Its a hard world out there thats why I'm sharing the above point of view. I hate to see so many people who are having an horrendous time, coping with their mental distress and who are also getting taken advantage off, dismissed, written off etc.

Thank you to the many people that have supported me all these years from many avenues
x

What’s madness but nobility of soul
At odds with circumstance? The day’s on fire!
I know the purity of pure despair,
My shadow pinned against a sweating wall.
That place among the rocks—is it a cave,
Or winding path? The edge is what I have.
–Theodore Roethke, “In a Dark Time”

Portrait of James (singer) with flowers

I sing myself to sleep A song from the darkest hour Secrets I can’t keep Insight of the day Swing from high to deep Extremes of sweet and sour Hope that God exists I hope I pray Drawn by the undertow My life is out of control I believe this wave will bear my weight So let it flow Oh sit down Oh sit down Oh sit down Sit down next to me Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, down In sympathy Now I’m relieved to hear That you’ve been to some far out places It’s hard to carry on When you feel all alone Now I’ve swung back down again It’s worse than it was before If I hadn’t seen such riches I could live with being poor Oh sit down Oh sit down Oh sit down Sit down next to me Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, down In sympathy Those who feel the breath of sadness Sit down next to me Those who find they’re touched by madness Sit down next to me Those who find themselves ridiculous Sit down next to me In love, in fear, in hate, in tears In love, in fear, in hate, in tears In love, in fear, in hate, in tears In love, in fear, in hate Down Down Oh sit down Oh sit down Oh sit down Sit down next to me Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, down In sympathy Oh sit down Oh sit down Oh sit down Sit down next to me Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, down In sympathy Down

The Dreamers Disease by Trampabel

Monday, 13 April 2015

Mosaic of crazy on Pinterest

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